What should i do if my girlfriend and i broke up because im depressed/sick and it wasnt a relationship problem?

my girlfriend and i broke up almost two months ago. i dont know what to do. i want to talk to her so bad but ive already pushed her away so much that she quote "too far gone to get back together." basically we were gonna get back together she jsut needed space. it was too hard to not talk to her just to know i would lose her. we have true and genuine love. we rarely fought. i havent tlaked to ehr for a month. i dont know what to do because i really want to talk to her and i cry at least a few tears a day but sometimes i get really upset. before i pushed her away to much she said she woul dlike the idea of us starting over in a few months but i hate the idea that we probablly wont get back together.